Random Thoughts From a Cluttered Mind

Once upon a time...

I started a blog.  I was going to post every day.  Right.  A lot has happened since then, some good, some bad. Last month (yikes) I told you all that I was going back to school.  Unfortunately, I have had to delay that for a while.  On August 28, my mother was diagnosed with liver cancer.  Mind you, she went to the doctor because she thought her ulcer was acting up, and that's why she had no appetite.

On September 9, she received her prognosis.  Inoperable, Stage 4, Primary Liver Cancer (HCC), with one year or less to live, maybe a few months extra if the new medicine works. WTF????

I have been staying at my parents house from Monday evening through Friday afternoons since then.  Debbi and the kids have been wonderful in their support of me through this.  The cats are simply confused and can't quite figure out why I go away and come back.  They make up for it on Monday morning by sitting on me because I am there (of course, the sitting starts around 3:45AM and continues until I get out of bed).

Caring for elderly parents (or grandparents) isn't easy when they're healthy, but it's multiplied by 100 when they are ill.  The emotional toll is immense.  Thankfully, I have a strong wife and strong and understanding children (stepchildren, technically) that are helping me through.  I also have seven brothers and sisters, who have been great (mostly) during this.  We all know, at least my sisters know, that it's only going to get worse.  My brothers?   One has lost weight, but I don't know why, one is still an asshole, one gets it and doesn't know what to do, and the other one, the smartest but also the youngest, knows exactly what's going down and is scared shitless. My sisters are also scared shitless, but they come over and cook, because they know I can't.

My father is a total trainwreck.  He met my mother at Somerville High School in 1945 in homeroom class. He was sixteen; she was not quite fifteen. They have been married for 56 years.  They have lived in the same house for 50 years.  They worked and saved and scrimped and raised 8 children in that house with 9 rooms and only one (!!!) bathroom.  And it all comes down to a year or less.  Sometimes life really does suck.

It's Been A While

Did you even notice I wasn't here?  I thought not. Humph!  Well, while I was away, I knitted a row and a half (!!!), had a birthday {:( }, and registered for college(?).  I figured that the only way to find a job at this point was to acquire some marketable skills. Am I excited?  Yes.  Am I scared? Right to death!  Fortunately, I have a really smart 16 year old to help me with my Algebra homework (of course, I haven't told her yet!)

We've been camping every weekend, and except for the rain, it's been fun.  If you've read Debbi's blog, you know about the tornados that went ripping through the area.  They touched down about 5 miles from our campground, and did lots of damage.  She also posted about the wedding, which was very nice, and this past weekend we had a pig roast that we forgot to bring the camera to (I am sooooo bad).

Today I have stitch markers to make for one of Debbi's swaps, and tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment (maybe I can get that thyroid to work again!)  And then...classes start in 3 weeks!

What Was I Doing?

I saw this on a Ravelry forum post and just had to have it....(No, I think I already have it)

A.A.A.D.D. – Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.
This is how it manifests: I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing. As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier. I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.
I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table and notice that the can is full. So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first. But then I think, since I’m going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first. I take my check book off the table and see that there is only one check left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Coke I’d been drinking.
I’m going to look for my checks but first I need to push the Coke aside so that I don’t accidentally knock it over. The Coke is getting warm so I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.
As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke, A vase of flowers on the counter Catches my eye—they need water. I put the Coke on the counter and discover my reading glasses that I’ve been searching for all morning. I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I’m going to water the flowers. I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table.
I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I’ll be looking for the remote but I won’t remember that it’s on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, But first I’ll water the flowers. I pour some water in the flowers and quite a bit of it spills on the floor. So I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill. Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day: The car isn’t washed, the bills aren’t paid, there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter, the flowers don’t have enough water, there is still only 1 check in my check book, I can’t find the remote, I can’t find my glasses and I don’t remember what I did with the car keys. Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I’m really baffled because I know I was busy all damn day, And I’m really tired. I realize this is a serious problem, And I’ll try to get some help for it, but first I’ll check my e-mail….

I'm off to enjoy a week of camping solo, ust me and the birds.  Debbi's coming up on the weekend, but I'm staying all week.  Maybe I'll get some work done!

The Little Banner At The Top

It reminded me that today is our Second Anniversary!!!!

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, SWEETIE!!!!!!

I LOVE YOU!!!!!!

I Don't Know...

exactly when the mojo is coming back.  Probably right around the time I manage to find a job.

Have you ever had one of those days?  I seem to be having one of those lives, and the worst part is I can't rant about it because the subject of said rant will read it!  ARRRGGGHHH!    'nuff said.

Summer is here and the campsite is starting to look the way it should.  I still have a lot to do before I'm satisfied (that could take years)( the last site took 9), but work is progressing nicely.  Debbi and I bought some plants last weekend and they have helped to perk up the area.  And she claims she saw a hummingbird!  (I didn't see it, and she didn't take a picture, so... ;-)

Our second anniversary is coming up soon (yikes!) and I'm desperately trying to think of an appropriate gift.  What is the traditional gift for two years?  Wood? Paper? A shrubbery?  ! KNOW!!!  I'll get her some YARN!  (Then she can make me socks! Shhhhh-it's a secret!)  Have a picture-it'll distract you from the secret.

Catching Up

Since I seem to have missed a few posting for the A-B-C Along group on Ravelry, I thought I would try to catch up with rest of the group. Bear with me, there are a lot of them.

F is for... Future Fiber!

G is for...Goofiness! (runs in my family )

H is for...Handsome! and Harry! (Doug is grey; Harry is black; they're both very handsome!)

I is for...Invisible! ( or nearly so...you have to really look to see this bunny that likes to hang out in our yard)

Whew!!  That was hard.  Now I have to come up with a 'J'.  Hmmm...tomorow.

Lost My Mojo...

I just couldn't think of anything to blog about.  Still having some trouble with it, but if my blogging mojo is hanging out with my knitting mojo, we'll likely never see it again.  So instead, I'll show you some pictures that I took last weekend, of some new friends I made.  Apparently, I have "animal magnetism".

E is For...

ELUSIVE!    We took these pictures last summer at camp...believe me , it wasn't easy to get the        Great Blue Heron to stay still for us.  We managed a few pix, though.  Jared took the one in flight.

Gorgeous, isn't he?

Another Test...

Another test with thanks to Mel from Cabezalana....

What Year Do You Belong In?

You Belong in 1977

Bold and brash, you take life by the horns. Whether you're partying or protesting, you give it your all!

Is anyone surprised?

What Dog Breed Are You?

What Dog Breed Are You?

Wow, You're a Golden Retriever!

Golden Retriever

The Charmer

Laid-back, sociable and well-groomed, you've got your own hip little pack of groupies who just love to be around you. You have a brain inside that adorable little head of yours, though you use it mostly to organize your hectic social calendar. You never poop out at parties, and since you're popular with ladies and men, as well as children and adults, you dish out your wit, charm and luck to whomever is close enough to bask in it. The top dog likes you and wants to be your best friend, despite the fact that he doesn't really know what the heck you do. No one does, in fact, but everyone loves you all the same. A true foodie, you’ve got your keen ears fine-tuned to make sure you don't miss out on the opening of a trendy new place to nosh. But your youthful days of being able to wolf down food 24-7 are wagging behind you, meaning you've got to watch what you eat so you don’t pull a Brando and outgrow your coats. Learn more »

FAMOUS GOLDEN RETRIEVERS: Bono, Robert Redford, Joe Montana, Julia Roberts

LIKELY PROFESSIONS: Journalist, Intelligence Agent, Venture Capitalist